Reasons for getting hitched

It’s not as exciting as Fight Club, but there’s this thing called “Chat Club” at the school where I teach. Most classes are structured and you have to focus on a particular topic – pets and weather for the lower level classes; business language and interpersonal skills for advanced students. But, there’s no structure for “Chat Club.” I can pick a topic and talk about it for an hour.

On July 4, I taught about the Revolutionary War and typical American holiday celebrations. Yesterday, inspired by a conversation I had with my friend Joy (who is Shanghainese), I chose marriage and started out with the following question:
Why do people get married? The first three reasons were:

1) loneliness

2) wanting to take care of someone and vice versa

3) fear (of what, I'm not sure)

After a solid ten minutes, someone mentioned the word "Love." I thought it was interesting that this was the fourth reason and not the first or second.

It was even more interesting to hear why people have children. Here are the top five:

1) having kids is fun

2) wanting to take care of someone

3) continuing the blood line

4) keep a marriage together (?!?)

5) hope that the next generation can lead a better life


Again, after ten to fifteen minutes of discussion, someone mentioned "Love."

The reasons for having children were much better than the reasons for marriage, but still I was startled, I thought love was the best reason for both.